Why me and Why now?

"You’re Not Hot Anymore, But You’re So Much Warmer.”

Over the past 20 months, many of us have become recluse and it's no surprise that  the “great resignation” and mental health have taken a prime spot in our conversations especially on social media and the title above may intrigue you.  

 A long-time friend confided in me recently that she went to her college reunion just before Covid hit the world and one of her male classmates offered her the observation "You’re Not Hot Anymore, But You’re So Much Warmer” that serves as the theme of this post’s title. She felt mixed about this as she was a true hottie in the day and had staked her identity on turning heads. But now, in later middle age, she’d moved into the land of invisibility, a place where many 40+ women find themselves. I reminded her that hot doesn’t last forever, but warmth is what we remember.

Beyond our looks and our likes (Facebook, Insta etc ) are our laughs and our loves. How we connect and enjoy time with those we cherish. My friend could get some cosmetic surgery, but she’s chosen to invest instead in a deeper form of surgery—a figurative sculpting of her heart.  To open one’s heart—at any age—is a courageous and beautiful act, which is exactly how we feel the glowing warmth that our hearts emit. 

Another form of opening the heart is being of service to others. Choose a cause that is dear to you and has the potential to benefit the society at large. And it does not always involve money - you can give your time via any social/NGO/non-profit organization and change lives of those who are not as privileged. I see many of my dear friends and past colleagues already doing it and I am very glad and inspired.

As for “Why me and Why now?” here’s my story. As a long time corporate type who got motivated to support Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) projects first in my 30’s after reading  CK Prahalad’s “Fortune at the bottom of the pyramid” and serving on industry professional bodies for a  decade and later by contributing to many of IBM’s CSR initiatives including one to make Athens a Smarter city, I have always looked for how to build a better community.

All this has taken the form of PSI (personal social impact) projects now for the past few years  in an itch to make this world a better place.  You may have seen my social media posts on spending my evenings and weekends with #youth empowerment and other community #giveback initiatives via non profits like  ASEI, TIE or OVBI .

I think it’s time for us all (applies to all men and ladies)  to get over being hot and start focusing on our inner warmth. As Maya Angelou so eloquently put it (with my tweaks added):

“I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, people will forget how you LOOKED, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Ping me if you would like to hear more or join hands.